Second order of creamed honey from Ioway Bee Farm finally arrived and while the almond creamed honey was a little underwhelming the blueberry one was almost *too* decadent. Like mortals were not made for something that tastes this good. This honey could corrupt a man from the first spoonful. It helps me to avoid eating half the jar in one go, though.
I’m trying to be but getting testosterone without a family doctor is borderline impossible.
Why are you people talking about my post like stock market speculators.
Currently listed as endangered by the IUCN, with only 6,600 remaining in the wild, African Wild Dogs are one of the continent’s most captivating carnivores and one of its most endangered species.
If you symbolically adopt one by making a donation to the WWF you get a 12" wild dog plushie or a wild puppy plushie. I’m not providing a link, I just thought they were cute.
I made the mistake of checking out the plushies when my wife was sitting next to me, so now not only are the grandkids getting a plushie, so is our dog…
I want an ice maker and enough room in the freezer for a pizza and that is IT.
I want the dumbest fridge you got. Gimme the orange tabby of refrigeration. I want my fridge to pull the wrong lever and turn my enemies into llamas instead of killing them. I want the following features: keeps things cold, has compartment that keeps things colder, a door that opens and shuts.
“Here at Stupid Jeff’s Dumb Appliance Warehouse we sell the dumbest fucking appliances. Check out this fridge. This fridge won’t ask you about your day, this dumb fucking fridge doesn’t know what an Elon Musk is and won’t fucking tell you what bullshit that dumb monkey is slapping into his phone today when you try to get some fucking milk. We took out all those "smart” electronics and in their place we put a loaded Glock 9mm that is put right up to that light that turns on when you open the door, which is the smartest thing in this fucking stupid fridge and let me tell you that fucker is on thin goddamn ice, if it gets too smart and tries to turn on before you open that door, the Glock will blow it to hell. Speaking of ice, this stupid fridge makes it. It makes ice, it keeps things cold, it comes with shelves. It’s sturdy enough that when your ex comes back to your place looking for their stuff that they think they left behind like nine months ago and they know that you don’t have it, but they wanted an excuse to come start a fight with you and throw a chair at your head but miss you and hit your fridge MICHAEL, this fridge will keep trucking because it gives zero shits and it only lives to keep things cold. Come to Stupid Jeff’s Dumb Appliance Warehouse, if you ask us if we have an app, we break your kneecaps.“
The only apps I want my fridge to have are appetizers.
I just saw someone say the words “jokingly gaslight” this might be a good time to reintroduce the internet to the terms “lying” or perhaps “pranking” or even just “joking” on it’s own
Okay, say it with me guys…
If you are giving someone wrong information in the hopes that they’ll believe that it’s true, then that’s lying.
If you are giving someone wrong information under the assumption that they’ll ultimately realise that it’s false, and that they will find this funny, then that’s joking.
If you are giving someone wrong information in the hopes that they’ll believe that it’s true and that their response will be funny, then that’s a prank.
If you are giving someone wrong information in the hopes that they will notice the differences between your presentation of reality and their perception of it, and come to doubt their ability to judge what is and is not real, then that’s gaslighting.
now dont leave this in the tags
If you are giving someone wrong information and you assume they will know it is wrong, in hopes that they will play along, then that’s a bit.
“[The creature is called] Moder in the novel. … It’s female. … I wanted to preserve my own experience of reading the book, wherein the creature’s design is somewhat shifting. Or at least you have competing ideas about what it might be. We dug into Norse mythology and discovered a Jötnar clan of giants that were known as shape-shifters and would sometimes present with combined human and animal qualities. It felt close enough to what Adam had imagined but gave us a little room to experiment. … I reached out to Keith Thompson, who I was a huge fan of, and was very fortunate to have him come on board. He experimented with those ideas and provided many different possibilities, as well as concepts for the decrepit parishioners, the effigy in the attic, and the hanging elk. It all tied together and told a visual story. The beast design we finally settled on was simply the one I couldn’t take my eyes off of. I think anyone who’s familiar with his work can tell through and through that this is one of his uncanny creations.” - David Bruckner
… I don’t know about you, but I fully trust this alien eel abomination. Surely they will prove to be a wise, compassionate world leader. What’s Jerry so worried about, eh?
so yves klein was a color field painter, also known as those guys who just paint a canvas blue, all blue, all the same color of blue, and sell it for a shitton of money. actually when it came to blue, yves klein was kind of The Guy.
BLUE
but back before all the fame and the blue, he made “yves peintures,” which was a catalog of his monochromes, pictured here:
the joke is that it’s bullshit! it’s just squares of construction paper glued on the page with little titles written below them. even the preface isn’t a preface – it’s just horizontal lines that he had a buddy of his sign with his name. one time yves klein and his art pals all hyped up a big big gallery show that he was opening. a solo exhibition! very exciting! all the critics and fancy motherfuckers showed up – three thousand people came. with great drama, they were led into a completely empty gallery. “welcome,” yves klein said. “I call it THE SPECIALIZATION OF SENSIBILITY IN THE RAW MATERIAL STAT INTO STABILIZED PICTORIAL SENSIBILITY, LE VIDE (THE VOID).” he was, in every way, a total fucker who loved bright colors and pranking the art world.
meanwhile, ad reinhardt – what’s ad reinhardt’s gig?
ad reinhardt’s gig isBLACK
more specifically, black-on-black grids of very slightly varying shades of black, applied in a very matte, powdery way that left the paintings with almost no sheen. it’s a pretty cool effect in person (if vantablack 2.0 had been a thing in the 50s, ad reinhardt would have busted a nut)
unfortunately, the way he did the paint makes the paintings incredibly difficult to maintain. if you touch one, the oils on your hands will immediately stain the painting, and it can’t be cleaned or repaired.
“no prob, bob,” ad reinhardt said to the flustered museum curators and collectors. “if you mess it up i’ll just replace it.”
“but what about our original ad reinhardt!” said the curators and collectors
“yeah i’ll replace it,” ad reinhardt said, “with the same original painting but not fucked up.” this caused some consternation
incidentally, he also made this small comic, which never fails to tickle me:
YOU, SIR, ARE A SPACE TOO!
one of my real favorite artworks in this vein is by robert rauschenberg, and i’m going to include the story of it because it makes me very happy. rauschenberg was an insane post-modernist – one of his most famous pieces includes a taxidermy goat with paint thrown all over it and a car tire around its neck, that kind of thing – and i love his piece titled “erased de kooning drawing”
so willem de kooning was the husband of elaine de kooning, who painted sick abstract expressionist portraits and was slamming hot
wow
willem was also an artist, and kind of a big deal in his own right, and friends with rauschenberg
one day rauschenberg calls him up like “hey i have an idea for a collaboration between us two art bastards. i need you to do me a drawing, in pencil”
and willem said “why”
and rauschenberg said “wouldn’t you like to know”
and willem said “why”
and rauschenberg said “because i’m gay, give it”
and willem said “that’s not a reason”
and rauschenberg said “fine, i wanna make a commentary on the value of art even after it’s destroyed and palimpsests and ephemerality and shit i guess, so i need a drawing by a famous dude to erase, and you’re famous”
willem de kooning said “okay” and proceeded to find the wettest, most difficult to erase grease pencil in his studio, which he then used to make several drawings until he came up with one he liked and sent it to rauschenberg
and to his credit, rauschenberg erased that motherfucker. he put in the effort. in a spectacular show of spite countering spite, he very nearly got rid of it all. look at this shit:
if that almost-blank piece of paper isn’t a work of art, i don’t know what is
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